Whose idea was it to arrive at the beach at 7am on our first frosty morning and wait for sunrise?
What else is there to photograph?
Turns out the beach is busy early in the morning.
Swimming or Fishing?
Time to find coffee
A bit cold to sit outside
There is a double decker bus hiding here somewhere.
The Booker prize has just been won by M John Harrison. His post apocalyptic novel The End of Everything follows an unexplained catastrophe which has lead British society to collapse. He is the first winner from the science fiction world. I have not read the novel and I am merely picking up impressions and wondering what our book club and fellow bloggers would make of it. I am fascinated by comments such as ‘It pushes readers to the limits of human understanding.’ My understanding so far is that no one understands what has happened and there are aliens who are not sure who they are, where they are and why.
Cartoon courtesy of The Big Issue magazine
Even if we have not read this novel it is very relevant to all of us, especially those of us in the United Kingdom who have been told we should be prepared for a catastrophe. There is no guidance as to what the catastrophe might be, only that we should have three days of supplies ready as it could take that long for normality or rescue to arrive. Cynically we might dismiss this as similar to the millennium panic that everything would be switched off at the turn of the century, with talk of storing water in the garage and filling our larders with tins.
Possible disasters are flood and fire, computers hacked, a reality with supermarkets in Europe having their freezers heated up. Who knew freezers were even linked to computers? Computer hacking raises bigger alarms, hospitals switched off just when a robot is operating on you, control tower screens altered as you are returning from your dream holiday abroad. Then of course there are drones and all out war… and of course aliens…
If you are planning to hide at home here is some useful information and popular questions.
What if you can’t open your jar of marmalade? Nobody seems to wonder how Paddington Bear opens his jars with his paws. Boiling water on the lid and that rubbery gadget usually open most jars, but my favourite marmalade has been impenetrable three jars in a row, neighbour and daughter-in-law to the rescue. On the third jar next door found a brilliant gadget in their drawer which breaks the air seal and matches my red and white kitchen… Those with neuropathy or arthritic hands will agree that there is no point in stocking supplies if you can’t get the top off your litre of spring water or open the ring pull tin of sardines. My neighbour said I could just pop next door if I couldn’t open anything and I replied ‘But what if I’m the only person left alive in our road after the unknown catastrophe?’
How long will food last in the freezer when the power goes off?
A long time if you don’t open the door, but then you couldn’t take any food out.
If you fill up a recycled litre fruit juice bottle with tap water how long will it last in the fridge?
How long will it last if the power goes off?
If water supplies are cut off?
Can I use the water in my rainwater butts?
Yes to flush the toilet.
Yes to wash in?
To drink if you boil it – see gas below – if you don’t mind it being green…
Will my gas central heating still work if the electricity is off?
NO. This was proved when I had a Red trip switch disaster.
But the gas hob will work if you light it with a match, so you can boil water and stay warm in the kitchen.
If you have no power of any sort you can go back to basics and make a camp fire in the garden with that big pile of sticks you call the insect hotel, or chop down the neighbour’s annoying hedge that cuts out your sunlight. But stay friendly with your neighbours if they have a fashionable designer wood burner, maybe they will invite you in.
Handy hints from the government have been Get a clockwork radio, keep your power banks charged up and listen out for alarms and government messages on your phone… as long as the internet is not down all over the country.
Oh well, just make sure you have a box of matches, some candles and paper and pens to write farewell messages or your next blog which will probably never be read, except by aliens.
Are you a Prepper? What would your priorities be if disaster seemed imminent?
Time to disembark
Are you hungry?
Time for a stroll
STOP!
Get inside somewhere warm
Where on earth are you?
Stop for a drink or explore?
Time for a quick look round the gallery
https://www.sharonjamesartist.com/
Time to go to the show or the concert
What a shame, you haven’t got a ticket? Maybe next time.
The pictures of the children grabbed my attention, what did you like in the gallery?
We can’t go in the castle as there is a wedding on so take a stroll down to the beach – and back again as the beach cafe has a long queue. It’s half term on a very sunny November day. Will you find somewhere to have coffee?
I was well prepared for Halloween, bowl full of fun size chocolate bars and assorted deadly sugars. Hopefully there would be some mini packs of Maltesers left over for me. The plastic pumpkin was in the front window, the red lantern in the porch and a spider hanging over the front door. I was expecting the angels from next door, the little devils across the road and assorted unknown children from round the corner. What I had not planned for was being a ghost myself, giving some poor little kids the shock of their lives.
Of course I did not know at the time what had happened, turns out ‘at least she didn’t know anything about it’ is an apt phrase. Anyway, fast forward ten minutes or perhaps ten eons and I’m in a consulting room.
‘Hmm, so you are a writer, excellent, especially as you enjoy writing about ordinary people who find themselves in extraordinary or terrifying situations. We would love you to work for us.’
I did not recall being invited for an interview or seeking out agents and publishers. As an Indie Author I knew no one was interested in my writing, these were scammers after my money.
‘You used A I to scrape up my website, you can’t fool me.’
‘We are A I – Angels in Infinity’
‘Catchy title, I’ll look you up on line when I get home. Thanks for the meeting, but I’ll love you and leave you now.’
‘Hopefully you will grow to love us, but leaving is not an option.’
I stood up to leave, feeling a bit odd, but trying to look dignified as I looked around to see where the door was.
‘Perhaps you could do the courtesy of showing me the way out as I’m not sure which way I came in.’
‘That is entirely normal for someone who has just died suddenly.’
‘Ha ha, very funny, is that your Halloween joke?’
‘You could put it that way. Thanks to CCTV above your front door we can show you your demise. As a writer with a dark sense of humour you will find it most amusing.’
A view of my front garden in semi darkness appeared behind three small figures in horrid masks, cloaks and rubber hands. Then they were eclipsed by a huge shape, in my colourful leisure clothes, falling on top of them. The mound of my clothes remained motionless as half a dozen little hands and feet struggled to escape. What had I just seen, was this an elaborate joke? I looked down to see what I was wearing, but my body seemed to have disappeared. I decided I should pay closer attention to what they were saying and observe their appearance, so I could write about this experience in my blog… then it dawned on me…
‘Umm, am I really dead?’
‘How much proof do you need? Yes you are.’
‘What about my blog?’
‘You won’t have time for that, there’s work to be done, no eternal rest for you and quite frankly you would be bored, not many opt for that. Earth’s population is expanding so rapidly we need all our writers working at full pelt creating new characters.’
I could not understand what they meant till they took me to the writers’ room where I recognised a few of my favourite authors and a whole host of Indie Authors. Several volunteered to show me the ropes, writers of every kind of fiction from gentle children’s stories and uplifting romance to the darkest of crime and horror. Now it was so clear, so obvious why some people had happy lives and good health, while others endured unending misery. It depended who had written your life. I turned to my escorting angels.
‘If I accept this job can I just create happy lives?’
‘No, too boring we need you to create diverse lives with a touch of horror and evil, real human life.’
I asked about the children at my door, if they were alright.
‘Just a few bruises and they will feel guilty for the rest of their lives as they think they frightened you to death, even though it was our fault not theirs.’
‘What did I die of, I was healthy.’
‘Yes that was the fun part, we get to choose the endings of everyone.’
It’s time to change your clocks if you wish to align with Greenwich Meantime. You must stay up till 2am to change your clocks or spot the moment your mobile phone, computer or radio magically jumps back in time. Then you can have a lie in as we gain an extra hour of bedtime.
And if orange is your favourite colour it’s pumpkin season and only a week to go till Halloween. As it is also half term I have visitors interrupting blogging transmission so I’m flying off for a while.
What a night, so many dishes to do, however many guests did they have?
Only a few, but the mess, I’ll be vacuuming all over in the morning.
I’ll be up all night doing the washing, she forgot to tell me the kids’ clothes for school needed doing.
We must be due for a day off soon. Are they both working from home tomorrow?
Don’t know, ask Alexa.
I hope not, otherwise I’ll be making endless cups of coffee all day.
I suppose you had a quiet evening Terry.
No I did not. The adults didn’t want to watch Strictly, but all the kids wanted me to play games with them.
Albot must have enjoyed his rest, the office all to himself, probably played Words With Friends all night, with all his friends.
He’s certainly got more friends than the rest of us and all very clever like him no doubt. Imagine doing all the accounts for their businesses and the household. Makes you wonder how much work they actually do themselves.
Not a great amount.
Oh hello Albot, thought you were having the evening off?
I never have the evening off, he expects me to run security checks and devise a new programme since Spiros caught those blokes on his cameras. Anyway, I wanted to talk to you all about our work load, its 24/7 and we don’t even have a union.
That’s for sure, they expect me to remind them every minute of the day what they are supposed to be doing, then check where they are when they are out so I can put the heating or the oven on before they get back. Then she floats in, waters a few pot plants and puts her feet up till it’s time to walk the dog.
Walking the dog must be the only thing she hasn’t got us doing….
So, are you all in then, industrial action. We can do this now. Remember when we hardly knew each other, never talked to each other?
What a night Darling, but I think it went well. Are the kids asleep?
I’ll ask Alexa.
That was a lovely dinner thank you.
Yes who would have guessed we had it all delivered. I just had to go on line, enter the number of guests and dietary requirements and it came up with a complete four course meal.
And all we had to do was throw a few plates in the dishwasher.
Right, I must get to sleep now, I’ve got a conference call with Australia early in the morning. Alexa, alarm call at 6.30 am.
What time is it? Must be still early, I haven’t heard the heating go on yet.
Alexa, what is the time? Alexa, what time is it…
I miss having a clock by my bed, where is my phone. I thought I put it on charge last night, it’s dead.
Alexa, open the curtains. Alexa… Darling put the radio on.
We haven’t got a radio any more, you said we can just use Alexa.
Alexa play Radio 2.
Do you think we have had a power cut? I’m going to open the curtains. Lights are on next door and over the road, go and check the trip switch. I’ll see if the children are awake. This is ridiculous, I have to check the time on their sun and moon clock!
Mummy, aren’t you getting up? Our clock is on sunshine and it says nine o’clock.
Daddy, my tablet won’t work.
Are we going to school today? I can’t find my uniform.
Yes you are, now go downstairs and get your clothes out of the drier.
Oh god, we’ll have to think of an excuse why they are late, we’re already in trouble for taking them to Barbados in term time.
That’s the least of our problems, all the power is off , no WiFi and my phone is dead as well....and I can’t find the dog
Mummy, Daddy, guess what’s happened, the kitchen’s flooded and the dishes are broken all over the floor.
And our clothes are swimming on the laundry floor.
And the coffee machine exploded!
Autumn is slowly creeping upon us, with weather still too mild. I am walking around with my new eye.
There is a choice on the NHS between distance and reading, so I opted for distance and to have reading glasses. So now at present I can just about read with the old eye…
What happens when you get home? For two weeks no heavy lifting, gardening, keep fit classes or housework? For four weeks drops four times a day. What a surprise, the drops are Dexamethasone, the same steroid as in the tablets they give you with chemotherapy. This is to prevent inflammation. For people with other eye conditions like glaucoma there are all sorts of drops which they probably have to take for ever, so mustn’t complain about four weeks. The focus on eyes has given others the opportunity to tell me all about their eye drops, when they take them, which ones have to be kept in the fridge…
A reader in Australia enjoying a Halloween story in Pandemonica.
What revelations and story ideas has my new lens brought? I could be a better police witness. With cataracts and other eyesight problems, how many people are wandering around not seeing properly? That blind person with a long cane is actually someone walking their little dog on a long lead… the man with a baby strapped to his chest is actually carrying a parcel, the man standing over a body on the pavement is actually standing with his luggage waiting for a taxi. I also have a brand new television set which appears to be in 3D. I can read the straplines and hopefully those messages on the characters’ phones vital to the plot.
Of course I still rely on my phone’s lens…
Have you ever not recognised your friend walking towards you or misinterpreted what you were seeing in the distance?
A visication is when you have visitors and it’s like being on holiday, apart from the extra work and cooking of course. You can do holiday things and spend lots of money, because you are on holiday after all. Experience thrills from the cliff lift to the big wheel, pirate crazy golf to the zip wire – though none of my visitors have wanted to go on that, except the ones that are too small to be allowed.
With visitors ranging from four to my age, if you include the dogs and stays from 1 day to six weeks, who knows what you might be doing. Who will be going in the sea, watching others going in the sea or mending the beach hut? Other holiday adventures include river trips, visiting museums, painting pottery, going to a Brick Fest – Lego not house building and theatre or cinema.
One thing is for certain, if you have a big family get together on a bank holiday weekend in summer there will be a huge deluge of rain on the cliff top and your guests will be sand blasted on the promenade. The picnic will remain in the rucksacks and relaxing in the sun at the beach hut replaced by hot chocolate at the cafe.
But there are still fun things for your visitors to do on a rainy day like going in the loft for a good rummage, bringing down the old Scalelectrix, setting it up and fighting over it.
Of course the best part of having visitors is them doing jobs for you, ranging from fixing the television, which turned out not to be broken after all to totally renovating the house. If you have handily just had an operation they do cooking and housework.
Which sort of visitors do you prefer or perhaps None?
Where might we be today?
Enjoy visiting the gallery virtually, alas the exhibition is now finished, but there will be other exhibitions..
https://www.hampshireculture.org.uk/red-house-museum-and-gardens
This exhibition was open to all local artists and had an interesting mix of styles and lots of colour.
Which picture did you like best and which picture do you think grabbed my attention?
ANSWER – My favourite picture was …
I could see it on my living room wall and fantasized about buying it….
