You could be anywhere, which way will you choose?
Walk or cycle?
You could stop for offee at the afe.
What have you come across now?
Perhaps you should check the signposts and make a decision.
Rough or smooth?
Time for a game?
How did you end up here?
Perhaps by magic?
Witch do you prefer to follow, footpaths, football or Whichcraft?
Perhaps by magic?
‘Daddy, can we go and watch the drones being shot down?’
‘What…oh er yes, just leave me in peace to relax by the pool.’
‘Archie Darling, are you sure it’s safe?’
‘Yes of course Fi, this is a top hotel, relax, we’re on holiday, the doctor told you to take it easy till the baby arrives.’
‘Daaad, if you had let us bring our phones on holiday we’d be able to see what’s going on.’
‘You don’t need to know what is going on Charlotte, the hotel management will let us know anything important. Don’t they look after us splendidly every year?’
‘Archie, it is a bit different this year.’
‘Yes, but it will all settle down as quickly as it blew up.’
‘Dad, that family on our floor were packing up this morning… and those people we were swimming with yesterday.’
‘Panicking, we’re British, we don’t panic.’
‘Oh God Arch, what was that?’
‘Way off in the distance, a drone they didn’t manage to shoot down, we’re fine up here. Anyway, it’s time we got dressed for dinner. Charlotte, go and find your little brothers.’
‘Oh look, those people on our floor are coming back with their suitcases. There are a lot of people at reception, asking the staff… I’m going to go over and find out what’s going on.’
‘Gossiping no doubt.’
‘Darling, they are all saying the airport is closed, they did not know what to do so they came back. That couple we were chatting to yesterday are talking about getting a driver, maybe forming a convoy. What do you think we should do?’
‘Fiona, we are not driving across the dessert with all the kids and you eight months pregnant. The airport will be up and running again by the time we’re due to leave. There you are kids, come on, dinner time.’
‘What do you mean the head chef didn’t turn up… limited menu and a delay? Ah here’s the manager, I’m going to complain.’
‘Down to the basement, don’t you think you are over reacting? I appreciate you have to think of the safety of your guests, but sending us down to the basement without any dinner is hardly going to help…
…Fiona, pop up to our room and get a few things for the children if we’re going to be stuck in the basement for a couple of hours.’
‘Archie, the lifts are switched off.’
‘Will you be alright on the stairs?’
‘They are not letting anybody up to the ninth floor.’
‘Daddy, is this a real war? That boy said they are going to give us all guns.’
‘Don’t listen to what other children are saying, now you stay with Mummy while I pop outside to see for myself what is going on.’
‘… and we are going over to Gatwick Airport now as the first plane evacuating British holiday makers lands. Families are waiting to be reunited after days of worry.
Good Evening, are you glad to be back home?’
‘Oh yes, we were holed up in our hotel basement for a week, we did not have any idea what was going to happen.’
‘You of course had priority with the children.’
‘Yes it all happened very suddenly, we just grabbed a few things, the children thought it was a bit of an adventure, didn’t you kids?’
‘I left teddy behind…’
‘I had to leave my hair straighteners behind.’
‘.. and your father.’
‘Oh yes, we left Daddy behind.’
‘I don’t know why you bother buying the Echo, there’s never any news in it.’
‘I thought I would find out what happened round the corner yesterday, headline on the front page.’
‘Nothing happened yesterday.’
‘Why were there three police cars then? Here it is…
Man Arrested in Dunholme Avenue. Charlie Sharp who lives in Dunholme Avenue said “We don’t usually get police cars around here, I don’t know what was going on.”
Masie Mason said “I was just returning from walking Alfie my poodle and I was astonished to see the commotion, it’s usually very quiet around here. I saw a man being put in the back of the police car.”
Another neighbour who wished to remain anonymous said “Someone just moved into that house. It’s very worrying, this used to be a nice neighbourhood.”
Jack, who did not want to give his surname, said “I was just coming out of my front door to take Bubbles my cockerpoo for a walk, we always go the same time each day, when he started barking and I said What’s up Bubbles? Then I saw three police cars driving off. The people that lived there before had a dog, Bubbles’ best friend, he was a caverpoo. I don’t think the new people have a dog.”
The Echo contacted Hambourne police station, but a spokesperson said they could not comment.
The Echo should have interviewed me, I could have told them about all those screams I heard the night before.’
It’s unremittingly grey here at Chez Tidalscribe, but jump into the time machine back to last Saturday.
Jump out of your car and follow the path to the sea.
Don’t fall off the pier…
Do you dare to go up to the zip wire?
How is your Saturday going?
Mrs De-Ath hurried along the high street on Monday morning to open her florists on time, but she stopped dead in her tracks as she passed the window of the new people.
We Put the Fun in Funerals said the bright yellow sign at the top of the display. Filling the large bay shop window was what could only be described as a model fairground meeting a pop festival and all drenched in a rainbow.
They had heard only that a funeral directors was moving into the vape shop closed down by the police. That had seemed excellent news with the prospect of new customers ordering wreaths and perhaps the occasional imaginative arrangement. The shop had been boarded up for a few weeks with the hopeful noises of improvements.
She peered closer at the Barbie doll lying in a pink coffin. Above it was a rainbow shaped notice.
No need to wait for the Grim Reaper, pop in now for free coffee and cakes and meet our jolly crew.
As Mrs De-Ath shook her head in bewilderment and looked at her watch, the door flew open and a figure like an aging Alice in Wonderland stepped out.
‘Greetings, you’re Mrs Death from the flower shop aren’t you?’
‘Mrs Delia De-Ath from the florist.’
‘Well I’m sure we’re going to get along, I’m Morticia. I hope you have lots of exotic flowers.’
‘Um, our customers are quite a conservative bunch… it’s all daffodils and tulips at the moment.’
‘I hope to change that then, I expect your locals could do with a good shake up.’
‘I think a good shake up might finish them off.’
‘All the better, more customers for me.’
Morticia went off into gales of laughter.
Delia scurried away, mumbling about opening times.
She did not have any customers that morning, everyone in town seemed to be popping in to meet Morticia. After lunch a gaunt young man dressed as a Goth sidled into the shop.
‘Greetings, Edwin, Edwin Drood, Morticia’s assistant, glad to meet you Delia. Now, do you have black daffodils?’
‘Goodness, no such thing. I thought bright colours were the er… theme of your establishment.’
‘Do I look as if I like bright colours? We cater for all tastes and our first customer is a Goth, was a Goth. We can get the black horses and the glass hearse, but his widow thought it would be a real laugh to have black flowers.’
‘The nearest I can do is dark purple tulips, or if there is time, perhaps I could see if my supplier could obtain a black orchid.’
Whatever Delia De-Ath thought of the new funeral directors, she felt she couldn’t turn down any business. The whole parade of shopkeepers and many locals turned out to see the Goth’s hearse leave. In a carriage behind, the widow and family all wore black orchids.
When Delia heard that they were going to have a biker’s funeral she wondered what the turnout would be and what the biker would be carried in. A large order of sunflowers did not fit the biker image.
On the day a huge line up of motorbikes blocked the high street and had shoppers gawping. They were all dressed in bright colours and greeting each other effusively, laughing and joking and sharing stories of Mad Mike. Delia approached Morticia who was even more colourful than usual.
‘What will his coffin come in?’
‘Oh no coffin, his bike’s on a trailer, as per Mike’s wishes. Ah here he is…’
Delia gasped. ‘That’s surely not him, sitting ON the bike, grinning?’
‘Yes, he wanted to be plasticized.’
Today my short story collection Tidalscribe Tales features on Smorgasbord, Sally Cronin’s very popular blog. She is a great supporter of fellow authors and regularly promotes their books. In this blog you can read Sally’s review and also an extract from one of the stories.
https://smorgasbordinvitation.wordpress.com/2026/03/04/smorgasbord-book-promotions-2026
Turn to my Books page to see all my novels and collections.
Today’s stroll started with a long brisk walk, but I’ve saved you that part. We are at the top and the end of Hengistbury Head. It was sunny, but seems to have got cloudy again. At least you can still see the Isle of Wight. I do not know if this yellow object was planted by aliens or…
Look down on Mudeford Sandspit, do you want to go down there?
Would you like one of these beach huts? Some look over the harbour, others out to sea and some lucky ones have a view in both directions.
They cost as much as real houses.
https://www.rightmove.co.uk/properties/150581153#/?channel=RES_BUY
£350,000 or more…
And you can’t stay overnight all year round and have to use the toilet and shower blocks…
Let’s go round to the sea shore.
Rain is threatening so we will walk round the harbour and head back.
Stay on the path here.
This leads to the dark woods of the interior, we are not going to enter in case we get lost or we can’t keep quiet.
Carry on…
… if you are ready for coffee and a little something.
Would you like a beach hut here, or just a walk?
Do you find new technology mind boggling? By new I mean anything that you did not personally know about this time last week. Do you find recent innovations mind boggling? By recent I mean anything that has happened since you left school.
You obviously think you know about technology otherwise you would not be reading this on a device of some sort, but do you know how it actually works? If you do, please let the rest of us know. For most of us the mysterious workings are akin to alchemy or the dark arts. Chips are involved and are made of silicone, rather than potatoes and silicone is made from sand. There is plenty of sand on the beach, but what happens next?
On line workings are supposedly run by AI, or computers as we used to call them, but how come these logical beings have a very human urge to deliberately annoy us?
I can do all sorts of things on line, but Arty Imp lulls me into a false sense of security and confidence. Browsing wallpaper on B&Q’s site on my desk top ( I like to see everything on a large screen ) it offered to send samples for a small remuneration. I put several into the shopping basket, already I could picture how my attic office might look. I put in my order as a guest, it wouldn’t let me, it seemed I had joined B&Q Club when I bought one garden chair on line. I looked up my little notebook and typed in my email and the password I had presumably used last time. It did not recognise it. No problem, just pretend I had forgotten it. Nothing would enable me to get a password they approved of, links were sent to my email, texted to me… I gave up, it would be easier to take two buses to my nearest B&Q where I would not see the wallpapers I liked, because they had already told me they were only available on line… Anyway, not as if it was important… but thinking outside the box later I decided to pretend I was a new customer and use my other email address, Not join the club, say No to being on the emailing list. I did not want any sort of relationship, just the wallpaper samples. My purchase went straight through with reassuring emails and they soon arrived in the post. Of course, obviously if I choose one I like they will not actually let me buy a whole roll…
To check how Tech Savy you are take this simple test.
You want to send money to your nephew for his birthday. Do you
It’s your sister’s birthday today, do you
You have not heard from your elderly aunt for a few days, do you
You need a relaxing evening after dealing with technology all day, do you
If you answered A to all the questions welcome to the first quarter of the 21st century, but beware what you will face in this next quarter.
If you answered B every time you just might be able to cope if all the electricity is switched off, perhaps…
But how is the present matching up to the future predicted in the 20th century? We are not sitting at a phone table with a curly wire attaching our phone to the wall and a little TV screen showing a live picture of our relatives on the other side of the world.
The first ‘mobile phones’ most of us saw were on Star Trek, some of us watching in black and white. Their hand held flip up devices could Teleport them down to a strange planet, but they could not take photos, text their friends, watch videos or Facetime with friends on the other side of the universe. It may have slowed the plot if they had to play back on Quiz Planet before stepping on to their platform.
On arrival on the new planet they stop to take a selfie together in front of a strange volcano so they can put it on Instagram. Then Captain Kirk pauses to take a picture of the Aliens who have crept up without them noticing. He wants to WhatsApp a picture to his mother billions of light years away.
Meanwhile a junior officer has not noticed the aliens as he is bending down to snap strange plants using the plant recognition App.
His colleague is glued to the screen exclaiming ‘210 points for OXO, how did he do that and I’ve got all vowels’.
Captain Kirk is now on Google maps, having failed to understand what the Aliens are saying, their language is not coming up on his translation App.
The weather App was not much use either as it failed to predict the electric storm and downpour of acid rain. It seems like a good time to beam up, but their phones need recharging…
Did you score A or B or perhaps AB? What is your favourite 21st Century invention?
Times and Tides of a Beachwriter 