Silly Saturday – How to Cheat at Travel

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Visitors from all over the world come to visit this place, Windsor, Royal Berkshire. What to some is the holiday of a lifetime is a train trip of six minutes – if you happen to live near Slough railway station. You cannot get lost because there is only one stop, the train travels all day long between Slough and Windsor and Eaton Central, curving round to cross the River Thames. The elegant station was built so Queen Victoria could come by train to Windsor Castle.

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The station is busy with tourists and has plenty of restaurants and designer shops, so you will feel as if you are on holiday. Windsor Castle lies before you as you step outside, but perhaps you will be having so much fun on holiday in the station you won’t bother.

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But if you consider it is not a proper holiday unless you cross the sea, why not sail to Southampton.

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Take the ferry from the little town of Hythe in Hampshire. Check first on line to see if there are any ocean liners in dock, you will get a great view from the little ferry and it is much cheaper than going on a cruise.

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Hythe Pier, 1881 A strong, light iron pier, 2,100 feet in length…

The railway is the oldest continuously operating public pier train in the world. You can walk, cycle or take the train to the end of the pier and the ferry takes only ten minutes. Stroll out of the ferry terminal and you can explore parts of the old city wall or walk up the road into the centre of Southampton. If you want to shop or go to the cinema there is the Westquay centre with Ikea close by. There are large parks, museums, a university, the lovely Mayflower theatre and a concert hall.

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But if you want to feel as if you are abroad ( and you are not lucky enough to already be Swedish ) just stay all day in Ikea and stroll amongst the wonderful ‘rooms’ pretending you are visiting your Scandinavian friends. Buy all sorts of things you didn’t know you needed and have no idea what they are, but just like reading the interesting Swedish labels. When you tire, visit the restaurant which also has views over Southampon Water and the ocean liners. Soon it will be time to embark for the return trip across the waves.

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Enjoy more travels at my website.

https://www.ccsidewriter.co.uk/chapter-five-beach-writer-s-blog/

Flash Fiction Friday – One Thousand

The Last Job

It was Oliver Twister’s last job. His family, those who were still speaking to him, thought he was going straight. Well robbing a betting shop was not theft, the punters had already given their money away.  His family and the probation officer thought he was clean and he was more or less, given that he could no longer afford to pay the drug dealers. Money was short; hence his latest plan. Nobody would stop him, who would risk their life to save the bookie’s money? Not that they would be risking their lives, but if they believed they were about to be shot or gassed they would flee the shop.

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It was Bill’s last visit to the betting shop, that’s what he had vowed to himself. He was supposed to ring his ‘Gamblers’ Anonymous Buddy’ if he got the urge. But this was not gambling, it was a certainty; he had followed the horse since she was a filly and everything was in her favour for the ‘three fifteen’ at Ascot. The jockey had notched up several wins with her, the wet weather made for the soft track that she loved and Ascot was her ‘lucky’ course. When Bill read in Racing Times that the favourite was out of the race with a tendon injury, he knew he must place one more bet.

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It was Samuel’s first visit to ‘The Bookies’. He had won ten pounds when he bought himself a lottery ticket for his eighteenth birthday, that in itself had been an act of rebellion against his Exclusive Brethren parents. A bloke at work assured him this was a good omen and gave him an excellent tip for the ‘three fifteen’ at Ascot; there was no reason why his parents or the elders of the church should find out. The only problem that he could foresee was that he had not a clue how to place a bet. When he walked into the shop trying to look casual, the first person he saw behind the counter was Lara, the beautiful girl he had worshipped from afar when she was in upper sixth and he was in fifth year.

‘Is it young Sam? I bet you don’t recognise me,’ she trilled ‘don’t tell the elders you’ve seen me working here, my aunty goes to your church. I need a part time job, my student loan isn’t enough.’ She helped him place the bet. ‘Just in time, you can watch it live on the telly in five minutes.’

There was only one other customer in, who looked like a regular, but their cosy chat was suddenly interrupted.

The door burst open and a gun entered, followed by an outstretched arm belonging to a large man wearing a contraption on his face that looked like a gas mask. They could not hear properly what he said, but they got the general idea when he waved his gun at Lara and Samuel. As Lara screamed, another primeval cry came from Bill the regular punter. He launched himself at the masked man, catching him off balance, but it was not enough. For a split second Samuel was paralysed with fear, but he focused on the dangerously waving arm and pistol.

Somehow the robber was face down on the floor. The older punter was sitting on him and Samuel had the arm pinned to the floor.

‘Don’t touch the gun,’ said Bill ‘it might go off.’

Samuel knelt on the robber’s wrist to make sure the weapon stayed at floor level, pointing away from them. A muffled cry came from the robber.

‘Shall I press the alarm’ said Lara, rather belatedly.

‘Not yet love, the race starts in two minutes.’ Bill pressed down heavily on the robber’s shoulders. ‘Nobody robs our bookies, no one threatens our Lara.’ He felt like a cowboy.

A faint gurgle was the only reply.

It seemed a long wait till the race started, but in seconds it was over. Bill cheered, while a confused Samuel asked which horse had won. Lara pressed the button.

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The police were quick to arrive and Lara was thrilled to be surrounded by hunky officers, who seemed more interested in her welfare than the prisoner.

‘I pressed the alarm button straight away’ she said.

‘Well done.’ They turned to the men on the floor. ‘Okay chaps, don’t move till we’ve got the handcuffs on.’

The prisoner did not try to resist; when Bill and Samuel struggled to their feet the prisoner did not move at all. The officers turned him over and with difficulty removed the fake gas mask.

‘Bloody hell.’

Suddenly all hell did break loose, one officer was urgently calling on his radio for an ambulance, while the others whipped bits and pieces out of their first aid pouches. Something was put on the robber’s blue face and a policeman started blowing, while another pressed on his chest.

Just as Lara kissed Sam’s cheek to thank him for saving her life, he looked down at the body and realised the full implications. He fainted.

Bill raised his feet while Lara patted his cheek.

The paramedics shook their heads, but soon had the man on a stretcher with an oxygen mask where the gas mask had recently been.

As the sirens receded into the distance the remaining officers chatted for a few moments in a surprisingly light hearted manner. Bill thought he heard one say ‘Oliver Twister’s finally got his come-uppance then, he won’t be missed.’

They put on more serious expressions as they turned to the two men.

‘We have to arrest you for murder of course, but it seems like a clear cut case of self defence, the CCTV will prove you saved the young lady’s life. You don’t need to worry about being charged with murder.’

‘CCTV,’ groaned Bill ‘I’m not worried about the murder charge… my wife will kill me when she finds out where I’ve been.’

‘We won’t be on the news will we?’ said Samuel ‘How am I going to explain this to my parents and the elders?’

‘At least you both won some money’ said Lara sweetly.

 

 

Sunshine Blogger Award Nomination

Thanks to Cheryl of The Cornucopia Allotment for nominating me. Here are my answers to Cheryl’s ten questions, followed by bloggers I have nominated and questions I have chosen.

https://thecornucopiaallotment.wordpress.com/home-page/

1.What is your favourite Flower?   Very hard to decide as I love so many, but perhaps the humble nasturtium, relative of the cabbage; their simple citrus colour flowers zing even on a grey day. I scatter seeds and when other flowers are past their best they pop up.

2- What landscape instils calm on a chaotic day?  The sea or a high hill looking down, what may be noisy below is reduced to a pleasant hum or complete silence.

3- What is your strongest practical skill?   Probably anything to do with needles.

4- What is your favourite craft?   Knitting and crochet, they are relaxing sharing with friends or watching television, but I would love to be able to create beautiful textile pictures.

5- What is your most unusual food craving?  Not sure, but I do love traditional mashed potato and roasted red peppers.

6- What if anything, is on your learning bucket list?  Vastly improving my digital age skills.

7- Have you a favourite author for a rainy day? Tim Winton, Australian novelist, born in Perth where I spent my teenage years, his books transport me back to a hot country.

8- To me sweetcorn tastes of summer! What is your sunshine food? Home grown cherry tomatoes taste of sunshine.

9- If you had the chance to learn to grow anything what would it be? Sweet peas, they smell so divine, but I have never had much success.

10- If money was no object what type of garden would you design? A sunny hillside; near the house would be the walled garden full of abundant herbaceous borders and raised vegetable beds. Descending to the winding river below would be narrow paths among trees and then a grassy spot to sit by the river. Everything would be planted to attract wildlife. As money is no object I would have a head gardener training youngsters and I would just float around dead heading and cutting sweet peas for indoors.

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The bloggers I am nominating are just a few of the bloggers who make me laugh, take me to new places or help other bloggers. No pressure, if you want to have a go answer some or all of the questions. If any other bloggers want to join in you are very welcome.

Anita Dawes and Jaye Marie

Beetleypete

Biff Sock Pow

Bluebird of Bitteness

Life and Soul Magazine

Notes From The UK

Stevie Turner

Here’s what to do!

1- Give a big thank you to the person who nominated you so others can find them!

2-Answer the questions from the blogger who nominated you.

3-Nominate other bloggers and ask them your own set of questions!

4- Let the nominees know about the nomination in one of their posts!

5-List the rules and the Sunshine Award nomination on your own site.

6- Let the fun begin!

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  1. If money and responsibilities were no problem where would you like to live and write?
  2. Many writers have pets draped over their keyboard or under their desk. If you could choose one creature to be your pet what would it be? You can opt for anything from a spider to an elephant.
  3. If you were invited to talk about your book on television or the radio which programme would you like to appear on?
  4. Which famous person would you be thrilled to have following your blog?
  5. You have decided to go on an adventurous expedition to achieve fantastic sales for your book. Where would you go?
  6. Number five didn’t work so you must fake your own death to boost sales, what sort of demise would you choose?
  7. You have been invited to a garden party at Buckingham Palace. You are most excited because A. You will meet the Queen. B. A loved one accompanying you deserves a day out. C. You like cake. D. You like looking round other people’s gardens. E. It will make a good topic for your blog. F. Excellent research for you novel.
  8. Research is hard work so you decide to use a time machine for your historical or futuristic novel. Which time will you travel to?
  9. Number six went drastically wrong, who did you leave your manuscripts and intellectual property to in your will?

 

 

 

 

Silly Saturday – How to Cheat at Poetry

Kite

The flight of a kite

Is a glorious sight

As it reaches great height

To the watcher’s delight.

 

On the Isle of Wight

It’s quite a sight

To show your might

In the annual kite flight.

 

At the regular site

They hold their strings tight,

Fly blue, red and white

If the wind is just right.

 

The rules some will cite

As day turns to night…

His kite was too light

Her cords were not right.

 

The flight of a kite

Is a glorious sight

As it reaches great height

To the winner’s delight.

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How long is a poem, how long is a piece of string?

With more than 220000 (100000 shloka or couplets) verses and about 1.8 million words in total, the Mahābhārata is the longest epic poem in the world.

The early English epic poem Beowulf comes to just over 3,000 lines, while Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s The Rime of the Ancient Mariner runs to 625 lines.

But there is no need to write lots of words and lines, follow this simple plan. Think of one word, write down as many words as you can that rhyme with it… then start writing without thinking too deeply…

 

For more poetry cheats visit Chapter Six at my website…

https://www.ccsidewriter.co.uk/chapter-six-fiction-focus/

 

 

Rays of Sunshine!

I am one of the bloggers nominated by Cheryl for a Rays of Sunshine Bloggers’ award. thecornucopiaallotment is bursting with creativity as a busy Mum enjoys indoor and outdoor crafts she can share with her children.

thecornucopiaallotment's avatarThe Cornucopia Allotment

Thankyou Nanny Maryanne for your nomination! I have used my daughters afternoon nap to prepare the post to the highest standard as I could not find a sunshine blogger pic anywhere I chose my own! It really was unexpected in response to a blog on February Frosts, however I am grateful you appreciated it!

1-Why did you begin blogging?

I wanted to test out old computer skills and built my website, so I decided to share what I have learnt so, I started a blog to share my knowledge and skills.

2- What do you think is most important in life?

To make the most of everything  you have, to pass on the elements of life which matter! Skills, knowledge, resourcing and planning are key to reducing stress and ensuring a balance which can often make you feel positive and satisfied without costing a fortune. This is why I enjoy…

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Friday Flash Fiction – Digital Dialogue – The Interpreter

Local man speaking in the tongue of his forefathers: It’s that time of year again, my annual trip out of town to see the land of my ancestors, earn a bit extra, but mainly have a laugh.

Interpreter: We have lived in this land for many generations, since time began, my grandfather was the village elder.

Local man: Who’s this idiot with the microphone – still, at least they haven’t brought Jeremy Clarkson.

Interpreter: We welcome you back to our village, now we have the well you built last year our women do not have to walk miles to collect water.

 Local man: Thank goodness I don’t live in this godforsaken village, if only they had a decent pub instead of that hole in the ground which dried up two months ago.

Interpreter: I had fourteen children, only three live, if we could build a clinic other wives would not die in childbirth like mine.

Local man: These ridiculous rags are so uncomfortable, I bet the villagers will be glad to get back into their denims.

Interpreter: It is too far for the children to walk to school.

Local man: The village children have all got the day off school again, hoping to get some freebies if they smile for the cameramen.

Interpreter: We send greetings to our dear friends in Great Britain.

Local man: Must remember to skype my cousin in Slough, remind him to watch Charity In Action, see what he thinks of my performance.